This is one of the paradoxes of practical mysticism--that in relationship the "giver" should receive as much as the "receiver," since in this paradigm, giving and receiving are the same.
The secret to this process is to reverse the usual concept of giving and receiving. To know in fact, that we heal another by breathing in the love in their being, by drawing out their ability to love, and by drawing out the Divine Light that is inherent in each soul, whether it is apparent or not. By consciously breathing in the love in the other, we are drawing out their capacity to love in a different manner than we traditionally understand. Rather than saying "I love you," we say, "You love me." We call forward the other's capacity to love and to heal the world and themselves by shining our light on the light already in them. We reverse the flow that most of us consider to be the way of loving kindness and at the same time we ourselves receive not only a healing, but a deeper level of contact with the other.
Love, healing, connection, or contact in relationship should never be depleting. If it is, we are misunderstanding something. Love is like the perpetual motion machine. It generates more energy as it goes along, not less.
© Shemsi Prinzivalli 2017
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